How to play it cool when it really matters

1. Stop your racing heart using just physiology

Sometimes a racing heart is wonderful – when it is about feeling alive, being on top of our game, falling in love etc...

 

But... 

• What if you are in a social or business situation? You're surrounded by strangers and you want to express an opinion, make a suggestion or just pass a casual remark but inside you can feel your heart starting to beat so loudly that you know that you will sound neither cool, assertive nor confident?

• Or what if you've got an important interview and you've done all your research and got the perfect responses prepared but in the heat of the moment the answers are drowned out by the sound of your heartbeat?

• And how about when your new partner invites you to meet his family or friends and you want to appear calm and natural but again you can't control your heartbeat?

Here are three tips how to use your own physiology to get out of the captivity of your own physiology.

Why do I care? 

 

Because things like that can still come up for me from time to time. Some sort of old social anxiety. So I thought that maybe some of you will also find this information useful. It can also work very well in dealing with the rapid onset of anxiety or depression. 

 

Interestingly enough, the techniques below were once  medical recommendations for sufferers of arrhythmia before the appropriate medications were invented. So you could call them 

                        'pre-revolutionary prescriptions'. 

 

They are all about stimulating the Vagus nerve which travels throughout the whole body and is a major part of the self-healing/relaxation mode. And they address the few zones that are accessible for Vagus nerve stimulation – the zones behind the eyes, the tongue and central core.

The techniques below will reduce your heart rate quite quickly so, please, make sure that you are sitting when you do this in order not to fall from a sudden drop..

• To address the central core - Take a slow deep breath in your abdomen. Diaphragmatic breathing. Extending inhalation and exhalation stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system, and the Vagus nerve is a big part of this system. This has the overall effect of slowing the heart rate, helping the body relax and move into self-repair mode.
  
• To address the tongue - Immerse your tongue in saliva while breathing deeply through your nose. To promote salivation, imagine that you are eating a lemon. If that does not work, then simply take a sip of water and hold it in your mouth while breathing deeply through the nose. Or chew on something – the best option is a chewing gum if you have it with you. This is especially effective because it combines two techniques – breathing and tongue immersion.
  
• To address the zone behind the eyes - Firmly press against your eyeballs and hold for a while. Not easy to do in social setting, but it is very effective if your heart starts to run at home or any other safe place

So learn something and try out what appeals to you most. There are also simple techniques to combat tears or inappropriate laughter which I'll fill you in on next time!

Shake it Up - Full Moon is Here!

 

Today at 11:42 a.m. a full 'blue' moon reaches its climax. You may be wondering what to do... Or what not to do? And why such a buzz? I love moon phases myself – I cut my hair and do my house cleaning and gardening according to the moon phases. You just feel more naturally part of the Universe when you move with its rhythms.

With the Full Moon, the basic principle is that everything, good and bad, is amplified – including creativity, our emotions, the effects of alcohol or drugs, even the intensity of our thoughts and intentions.. And during the full moon we also tend to bleed more – whether it is a period, or just a cut in the finger. So be very careful if you're using a knife :)

Here are my top 4 tips for making the best out of the full moon.

Tip #1 – Enhance your brain power – concentration, focus, memory, creativity. Simply do things differently around the full moon to shake things up a bit. Like - writing and stirring coffee with your left hand, putting on your left shoe first, going to a different shop for groceries, using an alternative route for walks in the park... anything counts.

During this Full Moon, drop any notion of the way things “ought to be” or what you have always done in the past. Acting differently creates its own energy and makes new neural connections in the brain. You have to think harder when using your left hand for a change even if it's something as simple as using a sponge in the shower. And you have to think and notice new things when choosing a different route to work.

Do this and you will enhance your creativity and feel more alive.

Of course, you can do this on any day, but I like doing it on the Full moon because the cognitive functions then are naturally amplified and the effects may exceed your expectations.

Tip #2 – It is believed that the full moon is a great time for diets. The reason for this is that because of these big external processes, the metabolism of our bodies also changes – specifically, the speed and distribution of water and minerals. Google “Moon diet plan” or “Christian Durafour lunar diet” for more details.

I don't do radical diets myself but my sister has been doing one day diets on full moons for 20 years and is as fit as a flea with about the same fat content. But what is interesting - the advantage of a single day diet is that it breaks the usual diet and “shakes up” the body, helping the body to make full use of the provisions of the enzymes necessary to digest food and absorb nutrients. It is also a great time to do some exercise to release the excess energy which can accumulate at this time.

Tip #3: try not to overindulge in anything that has the potential to harm you. The harm may be worse than usual – even moderate overeating could create more fat or result in larger weight gains than normal. Over-drinking at this time can lead to people doing very silly things while under the influence and is certain to result in a massive hangover. And if you feel the urge to pick an argument with a loved one, be aware that even a tiny difference of opinion may escalate into a huge row that will resolve nothing.

Tip #4 – Full moon amplifies everything – so for all your intentions, prayers, dreams, goals and visions, this is the time to give them maximum focus – they will have the support of a whole Universe behind them!

So enjoy the big blue moon whatever you are doing! The next one will be in 2018!

Why one-day rice diet?

Hi everyone, I'm back from my little holiday in sunny Latvia! 31 degrees and wall-to-wall sunshine. I'm told the weather was the same here while I'm away, but I have my doubts :)
 

Spending a few days at home with my mother's good food – all my old favourites: smoked chicken, Jubilee sausages, layered fish dishes and cheese salads prepared in my mother's very special style, I came back, I believe, with at least one or two kilos more than when I left here. In fact – I couldn't close my jeans on the way back home so I even bought some lovely new trousers with an elastic waist for comfort.

I arrived in Belfast, put on my elastic waist trousers the next morning and

decided that now was the time to act if I wanted to get back into my normal clothes again.

Thankfully, I knew exactly what was going inside my body and how to help get it back on track.

The thing is that it's so easy to gain some 1-2 kilos after particular feasts – like birthdays, Christmas celebrations lasting 3-4 days, my own holidays enjoying lots of meals made by mother, or any other lovely food overindulgences. In these situations, it is the water that has accumulated in the body during the festive times which creates those additional kilos.

Why has the water accumulated? Mostly, it's because the foods we eat during such over-indulences are packed with salt. Meats, some fish, chips, gravies, cheese, you name it. And where salt goes, water follows.

So to get rid of those couple of kilos, we simply need to get rid of the extra

water. How? There are many ways but my favourite is the short one-day rice diet. (This method is suitable for dealing with sudden weight fluctuations rather than long term weight issues.)

What is the rice diet about?

First, rice is very low in calories and, second, it contains good amounts of potassium which is like an anti-dote to sodium. The more potassium, the less sodium. Extra sodium gets excreted and when the sodium leaves the body, so does the water.

The procedure of the rice diet:

• Wash a glass of rice thoroughly to rinse off all the starch surrounding them. The water should be visibly clear. (The reason for doing this is that starch acts like white sugar – it creates an insulin surge and more appetite as a result.)

• Boil your rice (no salt) to 'al dente' condition. 
   
• Divide the rice into four or five portions
  
  
• eat only the rice during this one day and drink plenty of water to help wash away any extra salts
  
  
• Don't put salt into anything for that one day.

One day can be enough for you to wake up the next morning back to your normal self. Or maybe feeling even better.

But, if you're brave, you can make a two or three day salt-free, potassium-rich

rice diet, by including vegetables and fruits with high potassium content: bananas, avocados, green leafy vegetables. But my favourite method is still one single day of 'suffering'.

People who have some sugar fluctuations may find this diet quite stressful but adding a bit of a good lean unsalted protein – like boiled lean meat - can help address the sugar imbalances.

So try it – maybe just for fun to see how you feel after such a one-day extravaganza. As for me, I'm just feeling really happy to report that I've managed to fit back into my favourite jeans without any problem:)

Activation of Self-Strengths

How often does life throw 'a curve ball at us'? What we want and desire is to respond successfully to whatever life throws at us – with calmness and the certainty that we can deal with whatever is in front of us, and maintaining a sense of personal power and dignity.

I have no doubt that there are many ways and approaches we can use to achieve this state of mind. But one of them, a simple one – my favourite – is on my menu when I work with clients.

So I'll share it with all of you. Especially since it is something that anyone can do at home to improve their mood and behaviour for their overall benefit. To be more specific:

• It improves mood and behaviour in challenging situations
• it generates positive feelings of empowerment and being more in control
• enhances self-esteem by improving the beliefs you have about yourself – what you think about the type of person you are and your abilities
• improves personal effectiveness, allowing you to do what you want to do...

Activation of Self-Strengths

First, pick a challenging situation. How to pick one? Just notice that around some situations you have negative feelings – perhaps you keep putting certain things off. Or some situations make you feel frustrated. Or apathetic. Or panicky and anxious. It could be at work, or at home, or related to food or sex or relationships. The best type to pick is one that is a current challenge and that you meet almost on a daily/weekly basis.

Example. When I came over here to Belfast I became hugely anxious about talking on the phone or phoning anywhere. I could not understand what people were saying. I needed to see them, then I would at least get a rough idea of what they were talking about. I thought “they won't understand me; I am a foreigner, an immigrant, they will just hang up on me anyway. I don't speak in a way that they can understand....” I really panicked and froze at the thought of a phone conversation.

Second. Remember something from your past; a small event from your recent past can do the job excellently, where you successfully did something or used some skills or abilities in a similar situation and felt good about doing it and about yourself afterwards. The situation doesn't have to be identical to the challenge you're facing, just one where you tapped into abilities in a way that can be transferred to the current challenge.

Example. So I remembered that one day I received a phone call after an interview when I was looking for a job. All the worst conditions were in place – I was on the street with cars passing loudly by, it was quite windy and the caller had a real 'Belfasty' accent... But I remained calm and focused while the employer invited me to start working as of next week. I felt so proud of myself afterwards.

So the situation that I remembered was – I managed the phone conversation quite well despite all the obstacles.

Third. And then ask yourself a question: what does this situation say about myself? What does it tell me about my abilities, character, skills, values? And you will come up with one or more affirmative statements.

In my case they were the following: I can remain calm and focused when it matters. I can overcome a variety of obstacles when I am fully focused. People can understand me. I can talk on the phone to strangers here, I can understand them. I can keep my dignity in trying situations.

Why to do this? We verbalize the helpful self-truths and make them easily accessible. Because all the statements that you come up with are positive truths that tell you about your character or your abilities and skills.

These affirmations, self-truths, are very powerful, because they are the truths that you can easily recognize since they are based on actual situations. These positive self-truths can help you act in situations when you are not sure what to do, or when you want to act in some positive way rather than falling back to your automatic responses and becoming angry, or frozen, or just trying to flee or avoid the situation.

Fourth. And most importantly – activate this truth! How? Simply rephrase the 'self-truth' into a question.

“Can I be calm and focused when talking on a phone?” “Do I know what to do to in this trying situation?”

And you will naturally reply Yes to this question because it connects with an obvious truth. Yes. Because you already agree with it!

So after activating your 'self-truth' just notice the spontaneous response to it. Make a short pause, notice the positive response that it brings and then act from this new perspective.

Fifth. Summary - whenever you enter a challenging situation:

Recognize that you are facing your challenging situation,

Activate your self-truth by asking the question

Notice the change that the response brings (it will bring up the positive truth about yourself)

And then act from the new state of mind.

As one of my clients wrote after applying this procedure: “this exercise has already been of benefit to me and I’ve only begun using it. I’m keen to see how I develop over the next few months when the exercise has become embedded into my thought processes and I have used it in a variety of situations. Already I’m finding that the affirmation is like a safety net when I’m in a situation where I feel I have no control of myself or my responses. It anchors me and reminds me immediately that all is ok and that I’ve managed this situation before, no need to panic. It’s a powerful tool to have.”

It is like being a miner digging for gold, but that gold is easily found within yourself and your personal experiences. And once found, this 'gold' allows us to respond adequately.

So good luck and have excellent results!

Meanwhile, if you found the information relevant and interesting, please share it with others.
Comments, queries or recommendations, please let me know.
If you need more help navigating to healthier living habits, just call me or e-mail me.

Being Mindful of Your Mindless Microbes

How would you answer right now if I asked: “Who are you?” And if I added: “Why do you think so?” Your answer would probably depend on manyt things – if you have a family, or the kind of family you come froom. It might depend on whether you have children. Or a job, money, social status, beliefs etc. In short, your answer depends on whether you have something to boast about or not. 'Life' continually challenges us: “Are you somebody? Or nobody?” And much more depends on this answer than you might initially imagine.

The life and well-being of the microbes (bacteria, viruses, fungi etc) inside you and around you depend on this answer. They are everywhere. They don't have an agenda as such - to harm or to help you – they just live. 

But there is a difference. Yes, microbes live according to the same natural laws as we humans. However, since they do not have 'minds', they don't have stresses either and they become dependent on the stresses of their 'owner'. Ourselves.

 

So when someone is in an agitated state, preoccupied with some petty meanness or waiting for the appropriate moment to enact some act of spite or vengeance, they can activate 'Arcanobacterium haemolyticum', actually bringing upon themselves ailments such as throat infections, pharyngitis, sinusitis etc.

Another example is Rhinovirus (the virus which most often causes the common cold) which becomes stressed when the owner acts in a desperate manner because of their own mistakes. 

 

The behaviour of microbes reacts on tiny changes in their owner's mood. If the person is resilient to judgments towards himself or loved ones, doesn't become too easily flattered or annoyed... they will also be more resilient towards disease. By calmly taking things as they are, their microbes behave exactly the same – just continuing everyday activities. If a person naturally feels they are a “somebody”, they do not jump about proving it. They calmly accept others' thoughts and actions but continue to do their own thing. Immunity, in this sense, actually mirrors your emotional resilience.

The“I am somebody” person tends to enjoy great health and has good immunity towards illness. Therefore building psychological resilience is the best starting point for having and developing a good immune system or getting back on track.

For testing your own resilience and to read more, I find that the following link is generally helpful:

https://experiencelife.com/article/the-5-best-ways-to-build-resiliency/

And, of course, the energy work that I do in Health Kinesiology can help to improve the immune system as well as helping people to feel comfortable and happier with who they are.

Beware of Winter

According to traditional Chinese medicine, when the seasons change different organs become vulnerable as our bodies shift to keep balanced. In winter, the water element predominates which corresponds to our kidneys, adrenals and bladder.

The kidneys are the primary source of vitality, energy and heat as well as vital essence. Energy is drawn from this source during times of stress and anxiety or when the body requires healing. The Kidney Meridian is also called the “Root of Life” because it houses the pre-natal force that we are given from our parents at conception. The kidney meridian also includes the adrenals (which physically sit on top of the kidneys.) The adrenal glands secrete a wide array of essential hormones that regulate metabolism, support immunity, and control sexual potency and fertility. (The kidney system also includes what the Chinese call the ‘external kidneys’: the testicles in men and the ovaries in women, so is very important in sexual vitality.)

It is critical during the coldness of winter to support our kidneys and adrenal glands through proper diet and lifestyle, good hydration, as well as energetic practices such as yoga and Tai Chi which I love doing myself. This helps to keep your core warm and well nourished.

In relation to diet:

focus on warming foods like hearty soups and stews, whole grains, roasted nuts, root vegetables, beans, garlic, ginger, miso and seaweed. These specific foods help to fortify the kidneys, uplift emotions, nourish the body, warm the core and help you to conserve energy.

It is also important to avoid too many raw foods during winter because they tend to cool the body and can deplete our digestive “fire” which is the ability to assimilate food efficiently.

In relation to lifestyle there are many good old recommendations that help conserve energy so that there is enough to see us through to Spring

• Sleep early, rest well, stay warm, and expend less energy. This restores Kidney energy. Getting to bed early and rising after the sun has risen - at least during weekends - will help you preserve your warmth and vitality.
• Find ways to relax and release stress on a daily basis. Include yoga, meditation, relaxation therapy or a short nap. This will support the adrenal glands.
• Use seasonal acupuncture to help tonify the organ system. This can be a superb preventative (or if you've left it too late, corrective) treatment for body harmony. And as you may know – I offer auricular acupuncture treatments £ 10 per 45 min to support your body and mind.

For other diet and lifestyle recommendation during winter I have found the following pages to be really good for general advice:

http://fiveelementhealing.net/winter-the-season-of-water-element/

: http://www.reneparke.com/winter-diet.html

or http://straightbamboo.com/how-to-stay-healthy-in-winter/